February 15, 2004

Wacky warning labels

Bottle of drain cleaner which says: "If you do not understand, or cannot read, all directions, cautions and warnings, do not use this product."

A five-inch fishing lure which sports three steel hooks and cautions users that it is, "Harmful if swallowed,"
label on a snow sled which says: "Beware: sled may develop high speed under certain snow conditions."

A 12-inch-high storage rack for compact disks which warns: "Do not use as a ladder."

A smoke detector which warns: "Do not use the Silence Feature in emergency situations. It will not extinguish a fire,"

A warning on an electric router made for carpenters cautions: “This product not intended for use as a dental drill.”

A warning label found on a baby stroller cautions the user to “Remove child before folding”

A prescription of sleeping pills says, “Warning: May cause drowsiness

A sticker on a toilet at a public facility in Ann Arbor, Michigan actually warns: “Recycled flush water unsafe for drinking.”

A massage chair warns: "DO NOT use massage chair without clothing... and, Never force any body part into the backrest area while the rollers are moving."

A snowblower warns: "Do not use snowthrower on roof.²"

A dishwasher carries this warning: "Do not allow children to play in the dishwasher."

A CD player carries this unusual warning: “Do not use the Ultradisc2000 as a projectile in a catapult.”

An “Aim-n-Flame” fireplace lighter cautions, “Do not use near fire, flame or sparks”

A label on a hand-held massager advises consumers not to use “while sleeping or unconscious”

A container of underarm deodorant says, “Caution: Do not spray in eyes”

A cartridge for a laser printer warns, “Do not eat toner”

A household iron warns users: “Never iron clothes while they are being worn”

A label with a hair dryer reads, “Never use hair dryer while sleeping”

A 13-inch wheel on a wheelbarrow warns: “Not intended for highway use”

A cardboard car sunshield that keeps sun off the dashboard warns, “Do not drive with sunshield in place”

A Bathroom Heater says: “This product is not to be used in bathrooms”

A can of self-defense pepper spray warns users: “May irritate eyes”

A warning on a pair of shin guards manufactured for bicyclists says: “Shin pads cannot protect any part of the body they do not cover.”

A popular manufactured fireplace log warns: “Caution - Risk of Fire”

A box of birthday cake candles says: “DO NOT use soft wax as ear plugs or for any other function that involves insertion into a body cavity.”

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